Insert Insight Here...

Dear R. Kelly

Dear Mr. Kelly, I would like to thank you for the years of entertainment I’ve had at your expense. Sure, the Chapelle show parodies were hilarious, and who can ever forget that memorable episode of the Boondocks, but I must say that my most memorable experience was when I was in my CIS class reading the news on my PDA and I read that you would not be allowed to associate with Michael Jackson. That’s still funny to this day. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, and you will eventually be put on trial for having sex with an underage girl, on camera. Even worse, you engaged in the sorta thing that would make the Germans proud. Alas, the golden shower on an underage girl makes you that guy. Let’s hope your trial starts soon so we can find out more juicy tidbits about your life. I’d love to hear that all of your dirtiest songs were written to some underage girl you were smitten with, but who rejected your advances.

Enjoy your time in prison. It will give you a lot of time to write.

posted by SumThing @ 8:44 PM