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Shark Week!

I’ve always watched the Discovery channel. It was a much better teacher than school, and more importantly, I actually got to learn about things I was interested in. One of my great memories of the Discovery Channel was/is Shark Week. Shark Week used to be quite an event. There would be 2 months of ads always reminding you of Shark Week. It was like a national holiday in which you could celebrate the awesomeness of this group of sea dwellers. You’d see some pretty basic stuff. There was always the one show where a guy actually caught sharks with an overgrown fishing rod, and there was the ever-popular swimming with great whites from behind the safety of a shark cage. The most awesome thing about Shark Week: It was actually 2 weeks long! My little mind didn’t understand that it was because they didn’t have many programs to show, but it didn’t matter. There were motherfucking sharks on the motherfucking boat.

Shark Week these days isn’t as exciting. They don’t show that many shark-related programs during that week, and all of the excitement is gone. I can just imagine the talking heads at the Discovery Channel creaming their pants at the thought of Shark Week in the old days. They thought big. They were looking to hire that guy who does all those movie trailers. Shark Week was going to have better ratings than the moon landing. Truly, it would be the pinnacle of television programming, and the reason why aliens would visit Earth.

Shark Week is just a holdover from old times where you could actually learn something from the Discovery Channel. I’m sure that next year the only shark related programming will be a shark shaped motorcycle, and car. Gone are the youthful days of the discovery channel in which lofty idealism made young viewers such as myself believe in science and want to become scientists, and…err…other smart people. Now the Discovery Channel is a soulless wonder obsessed with making a buck right now. Now the channel encourages a generation of youth to build motorcycles and heavily modified cars. What has happened to you, Discovery Channel? You’ve sold out man, you used to be cool, but now it’s like I don’t even know you any more.

posted by SumThing @ 10:36 PM